- A biker meeting is an event at which the minutes are kept and the hours are lost, and if you do it correctly, you don’t remember it at all.
- The problems caused by a single piece of gravel are inversely proportional to the size of the gravel.
- You don’t remember your keys are in your pants pocket until you have your chaps completely on.
- No matter how well you clean all the soap off the rear tire, you will always find the bit that got away, just as you pull a hard left out of the drive.
- Leaves are always wettest on the road where you need to come to a complete stop.
- You ALWAYS remember to put your side stand up before taking off unless someone’s watching
- You always remember to put the sidestand DOWN *before* you get off the bike if you’re trying to look cool when you pull in…
- Horse power tends to corrupt; absolute horse power corrupts absolutely.
- The likelihood of rain is inversely proportional to your confidence that your rainsuit is still in the saddlebags where you left it. — You think.
- There is nothing more satisfying then having a car trying to hit you, and miss.
- You look for at least a half hour for every possible reason why your bike won’t start before finding out that someone flipped your killswitch to “off”.
- Fill what’s empty. Empty what’s full. And scratch where it itches.
- Early icing will only appear on hidden curves.
- Bugs never approach bikes with windshields straight on. They always fly in from the 10 or 2 o’clock position.
- You will encounter a radar trap one turn before you expect it.
- Reserve is most needed 40 miles before the next station.
- The buddy system is essential to your survival; it gives a car somebody else to hit.
- Damn! I swear I went further on reserve the last time.
- Whenever you want to show off those fancy new pipes & roar off speed shifting down the highway, you will forget to turn on the gas.
- If it has tits or wheels, it WILL give you trouble.
- Remember, “No good deed goes unpunished”.
- Nothing improves with age.
- If you pack every size of metric, American and Whitworth allen head wrench, you will need a Torx bit. If you pack the Torx bits you will forget the socket wrench.
- Never park your motorcycle between a fire hydrant and a dog.
- A man is only a man, but a good bike is a ride.
- The first thing you do after putting on your rainsuit is lean against the pipes.
- You remember to flip the petcock switch from “reserve” just when you are running out of gas.
- All of the rain that falls on your motorcycle is absorbed into the foam of your seat.
- All motorcycle jackets are designed to “puff up” like a balloon when riding over 45MPH.
- You always remember to remove that disk-lock until your at a rally and everyone’s looking as you suddenly stop and fall down.
- Sand and gravel hauling trucks driving in front of motorcycles never have tarps.
Murphy’s Law of the Open Road:
When there is a very long road upon which there is a one-way bridge placed at random, and there are you and
two cars on that road, it follows that:
(1) The two cars are going in opposite directions.
(2) They will always meet at the bridge.
(3) You will be in between.